HALLOWHIRLWIND
We don't get any kids here. We didn't last year so I didn't plan for it this year.  I didn't even buy anything to give out. The weather was yucky and we didn't leave the light on. Still - The Dad insisted that all the house lights stayed off.  Like I was going to answer the door anyway if the doorbell rang!  I literally ate my pork chops and applesauce by lantern light!

It's been a crazy couple days with Halloween parties and activities at work... the kids/grandkids of the staff came the other night and Lily did too - she did room visits in costume and we had our big party today.  Cindy and I did a pumpkin carving demonstration and put the pumpkins out by the entrance...

Still miss the good old days - at the house... with my mason jar lights and the kids coming to the door while we were eating my birthday dinner and RoseBud showing off her costume...

The residents just love the Lily Bud... If you didn't know it by now my puppy dog rocks. Take a look at my beautiful cowPUG here.

Happy Halloween to all and here's to the little paranoid boy that used to come to the door at Dixon House and frantically ask if there were nuts in any of our treats.  I'll forever think of you on Halloween. ;-)

A DATE TO REMEMBER
This last week of October is always active date wise... I have my parent's anniversary (25) and my mother's birthday (28) which was also a date to remember for me and DCD... You know how I like my numbers.  Then there's Halloween (31) which was usually my Birthday party/dinner while the kids were trick-or-treating...

I had to unexpectedly go into work 'till noon on Tuesday -  we had planned to get some work done at storage so we just started in the afternoon.

I brought a change of clothes with me and got naked in the car and changed into my after school clothes. We always assess the situation which involves some serious pre-planning of how we are going to move all the boxes and bins.  I'm am so not good at that so I just do what I'm told and provide the heavy lifting.  I'm not sure why it took me so long to realize that a bin makes a lovely ottoman during our breaks.

I don't have the luxury of time anymore to go through everything so some of my treasures are just being pushed to the back of the unit until I can go through them. When will that be?  I don't know.  I feel like I'm spinning when I'm there and when I think about being there. It makes me sad to just know that my things are going to be unaccessible.  I think I would be more sad if I just threw everything away. What do you do with a lifetime of stuff?  I don't have the answer.  All I can say is, even though we have way too much fun and laugh and carry on when we are at storage,  it is very unsettling and chaotic and makes me horribly depressed.  Even more than finding bins like this - labeled in my own little special way...

Getting back to my numbers, though... we found a bunch of charms in a box - some were from my mother's old charm bracelet.  A record charm with a date. I don't know what the date means... I'm thinking it was when they got engaged.  Chrissy thought it was something else - wink wink. We laughed about that and told some stories and then got back to work.

THESE ARE DAYS
We were just talking about the Graffiti Rock Challenges for some reason and, this is weird, but I often wake up in the middle of the night from a dream of me downstairs in that club in state college - it's a dream like vision of a real occurrence .. I remember a time when Bill opened for Rusted Root - was it with TGF or Shiloh - I can't even remember? I do remember everyone bouncing up and down to Send Me On My Way. I can still see it.  Those days at Nick's Fat City too.  A friend of mine gets mad and says I like the 90s channel on my radio a little too much. Those were days.  I don't think there's any shame in liking the Gin Blossoms then or now - just saying.  ;-)

Anyway,  I was driving down Fifth Avenue today and looked over and saw the City Paper box...

I was instantly transported to so many moments in time - like that show when DCD and I got serenaded when we got engaged with Bill's rendition of Sweet Thing and to that Fourth of July night with the perfectly timed spectacular fireworks to the perfectly sung chorus of Lost in America... Magical.

City Paper Article here.

CD release show info here.

Rock on, boys.

PUMPKIN DECORATING CONTEST
Each department was asked to decorate a pumpkin...

The gumball machine was ours!

THE PUGFATHER

WHAT'S YOUR NUMBER?
Can't even remember what movie this was - Outbreak maybe...

and I went to the post office and saw this...

I had to make 150 copies of something and the machine stopped on me - guess how many copies were made... 126.  I swear I am not making this up. I mean, that's super weird - isn't it?

I went to that Japanese place in the mall and got take out and my order number was 126...

...and a few weeks later I got two orders for me and The Dad and the amount was 12..60.

This ambulance I was behind... look at the number on the door. 612. Come on. ;-)

Today would have been my parents 45th wedding anniversary.  They only made it to 24. She died 2 months before their 25th.

I swear I have PTSD every time I see that number - 24. One of the last texts I got from a certain someone said thanks for wasting the last 24 years of my life.  Another string of words I don't think I'll ever get over.

Over half our lives of good times and bad to come down to that one sentence.

They say sticks and stones may break your bones but words will never hurt you.

I'm not so sure about that. ;-(

OOPS!... WE DID IT AGAIN
Another day of SAP.

Storage Avoidance Procedure.

I know - again... My one day off this week and what did we do?  We went to Penn State!

This time - Behrend - to get Michael.

We went up a little early to go shopping while he was in class... it was my first time up there so I wanted to look around.  In true Jeannine fashion - yes - we stopped at the grocery store! I had to check it out and get muffins. I LOVE YOU WEGMANS!

I asked several people if they could give us some recommendations for lunch that weren't chains... weirdly no one could come up with anything. They all just raved about the big restaurants we were already familiar with. There's everything up there.  We ended up at a place in the mall. I had a really delicious club sandwich on jalapeno corn bread with roasted red pepper mayo. The restaurant was Firebirds which I've never been to one so we thought we could make an exception on our go to where the locals go/mom and pop roadtrip eating rule! The BLT salad was delicious too.

The sink was fabulous in the restaurant bathroom... as well as the tile and one little lit candle above the toilet stalls.  Seriously - check out this sink!

We finally got to Michaels - a little late because of a stop off at Marshall's to look for more unneeded Christmas houses...

I didn't get any BTW!

I love college dorm rooms.  His was pretty sparse - only one little decoration on the windowsill.

I would love to have a replica of my dorm room in a spare bedroom. I actually still have the sheets and comforter in storage so I have a good start!

I don't remember our dorm study lounges being this good looking!

Still feel a little guilty for not taking advantage of this day and cleaning out storage. Our goal was to get it down to one unit by November 1st.  That's not happening.  It was a really good road trip, though, so it was worth it!

YOU DROPPED A BOMB ON ME
So, have you seen the little girls saying the f-word in the name of girl power? I would assume and hope that this group educated these kids on what they were doing and didn't just give them a script and tell them to get sassy and go for it... I know there are already different camps for and against it -  with some of them saying this is exploiting youngins to get a message across... The issue may be what you consider the f-word to be:  fuck or feminism!? What means more - the word or the message? It got people listening and talking so, with that said - well done!  If you haven't seen it yet and, like me, don't mind watching adorable little girls in princess dresses say fuck  - here's the link to the video. Think of it what you wish.

On a side note, I got back late from work the other night and the Dad was out with the dog... I was on the phone with Chrissy... I walked in from the garage just as The Dad was coming in from outside with The Bud.  I noticed a daddy long legs monster bug on the door.  He said he would get it and I said to leave it alone and let it live - just get the dog away from it.  Chrissy was on the phone screaming KILL THE MOTHER FUCKA!  So now, my dad is saying that phrase non-stop.  Like before we go to bed... he peaks in and says Good night - kill the mother fucka... He made burgers last night and called me in and said burgers are ready to roll, Jeannine - kill the mother fucka... I called him after his doctor appointment and he said the doctor said everything was ok - and he missed me at the appointment and told me to call him if I had any questions but his kidney function was the same and he said I should kill the mother fucka.

This was the first kidney doctor appointment of his I missed in two years because I had to work but something tells me Dr. F. didn't really say all of that! ;-)

It's getting a little out of hand.

And it's kind of hilarious.

BUNDLE OF JOY
Found this in my drafts folder - forgot to talk about this...

Did you see this photoshoot?  Cliche Newborn Photoshoot Starring A Dog.  I always wanted that shot with the feet!!!  With a baby and a dog!

And the one where the husband took the maternity photos because the wife didn't want to.  All the proofs are on the photographer's site. Funny stuff.

I still wonder if I'm going to be one of these old people like the ones I take care of - sitting in my bed sad and upset that I never had kids.

I don't think I'll ever get over that.

Ever.

TACO TUESDAY

We laugh sometimes because - very often - Chrissy and I are either taken as sisters or a couple.  The other day a family member of a resident randomly asked me if I was Chrissy's sister... turns out she was a friend of hers from high school and she said I reminded her of her... She was telling me about my mother-in-law taking them to Churchill for a luncheon and she said, to this day, it was one of the best days of her life.

Almost every time we go to Taipai Tokyo the waitress will ask me and Cara if we want our leftovers in one bag... like we are going home together.  We laugh at that all the time.

I had to run some errands after work tonight so I just stayed out - I called Cara to see if she wanted to meet for dinner... we went to Mad Mex and got some Gobbleritos.

Yum-O.

Anyway, after we ordered I told the girl that I would have a take out order ... she asked if I wanted to keep a menu.  I said no and just kind of mumbled that I thought he just wanted tacos and we'll figure it out later. When we were done I ordered the takeout and we had dessert... she brought the check and as we were leaving she was at another table taking an order - she screamed out - THANK YOU - I HOPE YOUR HUSBAND LIKES THE TACOS.

I said, thanks.  I'm sure he will.

Total assumption on the husband thing but for once, they didn't think we were gay.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.  ;-)

SEW ON AND SEW FORTH

One of my co-workers asked me to go to her quilt meeting with her tonight.  A few other ladies that work in the facility go, as well as my old boss.   I don't know how to quilt - at all -  but there was an artsy speaker she thought I would be interested in and it was a really good meeting.  There were a ton of people there and all brought stuff to share - extra fabric, books, magazines, supplies.  They had the speaker and then the meeting and then show and tell!  If I ever get my year old sewing machine that Cara got me for my birthday LAST year out of the box I just may give some things a try! I wish it wasn't trapped behind three hundred boxes in the game room!

We went to the thrift store before the meeting to kill some time and I found this old porcelain Charlie Chaplin doll there for $3.99!!   He's missing his cane and I have no intention of selling him but I found a few online between $30-$80. Can I just go junking for a living?? I'm pretty good at it! ;-)

THIRSTY
Lately, I feel like I can drink an ocean...

I feel like I need to get under water and stay there and soak it up like a sponge...

I feel like I need to be watered like a flower...

I know there's some symbolism with this... baptism and rebirth...sinking...drowning.  Sometimes I feel like I'm spiraling down the drain...It's everything - good and bad, some times all at once.  I bought this bubble bath around Mother's Day - I've yet to take a bath with it. Maybe tonight.

Masaru Emoto died a couple days ago. I have a been a big fan of his work for many, many years.  I keep his water crystal oracle cards on my desk and use them all the time.  His work on molecular changes in water when exposed to positive and negative intentions is fascinating.

More info on his life and work here.  Rest in peace, Dr. Emoto.

I'M SO FANCY - YOU ALREADY KNOW...
The Dad broke out the diamonds for tonight... ;-)

We went to a lovely 50th Anniversary dinner at Savoy for one of his long time friends.

Everything was delicious...

These guys go way back...

The happy couple and some of the family recently came back from Italy where they had a surprise renewal of their vows and one of the daughters got engaged there so we watched the video.  It was reminiscent of a DiGioia party... big family - the kids spoke - the grandkids wrote something... It was a little melancholy for me because of that but it was a very sweet night.

Viva L'Amore!

THIS WORKING SHIT IS TOTALLY MESSING UP OUR ROAD TRIPS

SAP going on today... Storage Avoidance Procedure...

We took Katherine up to Penn State to visit Joe for the weekend.  Fortunately they needed some groceries.

Hello, beautiful...

Love you, Friday Farmer's Market!

We took the kids to The Tavern...

... I didn't realize the G-man was closed!  Though the last time we were there it wasn't that great.  Leslie and I had some good times and some good potato skins there. ;-(

I have to work the weekend (which sucks) so we couldn't stay... we ended the night with some late night milkshakes and off we went.

STUCK BETWEEN A ROCK AND A HARD PLACE
It's actually more like a boulder.

Hmm.

I have a dilemma .  I just made a reasons to stay and reasons to go list regarding whether or not to move.  The Dad is still, surprisingly, not opposed. I'm still not sure if it's feasible. It's a lot to take in with everything else that is going on.The Dad's health is not so great and mine is questionable... should we really do this now? There's something exciting about a fresh start.  It's also a little menacing... IDK -  I need to revisit this very soon...

WHAT THE PUG?
I work late on Wednesdays so I go in later... I was cracking up this morning.  I checked my email from home.  My boss was going out on a field trip so she sent out an email with stuff for all of us to do and said Lily was under the weather and wouldn't be making it in this afternoon. She's like a little employee. LOL

I really have the best co-workers!  Rev. Bill gave me this mug today.  How cute!

Remember the photo shoot for the charity calendar?  We just got them in. I can't believe they used this pic!  It was one of my favorites! And it's Lily's birthday month too!

IT DOESN'T MATTER BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE A HUSBAND

Cara had a pampered chef party awhile back and I brought a dip over in my favorite snowman dip holder.  I know... It was like August and I have several other dip things but I like this one and snowmen are my jam so I don't really think anything of it to use snowmen in the summer...  Anyway, I brought it home and it's been sitting on the dryer because it's too hard to move things in front of the cabinet it goes into.

I was on the phone with Chrissy, close to midnight the other night, letting the dog out and avoiding monsters and doing the fourth or fifth load of Glo's poopy laundry. I was trying to maneuver clothes out of the washer and into the dryer and got all caught up and hit the dip holder and it went flying...

It seemed like it was in slow motion. I actually caught it but, just as I did, the insert went flying and fell to the floor and shattered into a bunch of pieces.  I put the phone down and hurried up and got the pieces before The Bud got to them. I got back on and Chrissy asked what the hell happened.

I told her I broke my most favorite snowman dip holder but it didn't really matter...

She asked me why?

I said - because I dont have a husband.

It just kind of came out.

She started laughing...

Then I started laughing... but I was totally serious.

Even though this was one of my most favorite things it can't be any worse than not having a husband, right?

Is that weird? I don't mean that in any kind of co-dependent way... It's just the truth. Unless you were walked out on by someone that promised forever to you - you might not get it.

It's all really wanting what you have.  My life was what I wanted so why wouldn't I have still wanted it?  Does that make sense? I know this is just my point of view. It's just been pissing me off when I hear things like you are so lucky... or you can have mine... or I don't want the one I have.  Then walk out.  Leave. Find your own way. People do it every day.

I don't need a husband. I really don't.  Not for anything now.  I just wanted one.  I think that's a really good thing.  I'm proud to say I was right where I wanted to be.  I might have wanted to be a little thinner and maybe a little taller and wanted a baby and all that.  Things weren't absolutely perfect but they were good and I feel lucky to have had that when I did.

PUG FIGHT CLUB
I woke up to this...

She must have gotten up in the middle of the night during the three minutes that I slept in the last few days and attempted to scratch her face off.  I went into work and called the vet to see if she could come in for a sick visit and there we were...

Waiting to see the doctor...

My poor little pup-aroni. ;-(  She got a shot and 21 days of pills and I got a giant unsweetened iced tea with cranberry from Sonic.

Side note - Don't you just love this time of year?  The moon was out this morning and the colors of fall are spectacular, aren't they?

WHEEL OF FORTUNE

There was a segment on one of the early shows the other morning about the number one reason for personal bankruptcy is due to people not being able to pay for their cancer drugs.  A couple months ago I went to my oncologist and she wanted to change my medicine.  The plan was to stay on my original meds (which I pay a copay for) for five years and then go to another drug for the next five years... Just the day before my appointment, research showed that going to the second drug after two years may be better.  I'm not sure I trust the reasoning but I thought maybe I should give it a try.  The medicine turns out to be $580.00 a month.  I did some research and there is a discount program and I can get it for $370.00 a month.  Still -there's no way I can afford that. I'm not quite at 2 years anyway so I decided to just stay on what I've been taking and re-visit it at my next appointment in a few weeks. Still, though, I'm a little worried about all of this.