Friday, March 29, 2013

88/365

THIS LITTLE PIGGY

I have a bunch of these figurines...  I had them all in a curio in the dining room. They are now all individually wrapped in bubble wrap in bins. Honestly, I'm not even sure where they are.  I think they are in Cara's garage but I'm not 100% sure on that. I had to get them out of Glo's and now I don't know where anything is anymore.

I don't have the one in the picture. I saw it on Ebay and thought I would post it today.  It's an anniversary of sorts.  The anniversary of when David packed his bags and left and the anniversary of the third miscarriage.  It was the third in four years.  We found out a couple weeks before then that there was no heart beat.  I decided to not do a D&C this time so we weren't sure when it was going to happen.  He left in the morning... it happened that night. The other two are already starting to get foggy... I remember the futon in the den and a cherry popsicle with the first one... The second one - I can't remember if we ordered from Max and Erma's or Mineos... and was that Wall-E or Coraline??? I don't know. It's funny what you remember and what you don't.  This one, though, I remember it like it was yesterday. I was back and forth on the phone with Aunt Joyce and Sharon and Chrissy... I remember I summoned up the spirits of the women that went before me. I was scared I was going to bleed to death by myself even though I was pretty calm.  The pup was making me nervous too because she was whimpering all night. I think she thought David was downstairs. I remember after it was all over taking her outside to go potty and eating in the kitchen. I made mashed potatoes. It was during my favorite 3 am hour. I remember sleeping pretty well - just from exhaustion.

We never really mourned this loss as we should have... or anything else. I'll talk more later on that. I think I'm going to bed now...   Glo's apartment is pretty well empty.  I was there all day cleaning yesterday and the girls and I were back over there today.  This little piggy is exhausted.

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