Sunday, May 8, 2011

128/365

"AND THE ROSEBUDS KNOW TO BLOOM IN EARLY MAY..."

I didn't get breakfast in bed or a hand drawn card this morning for Mother's Day... instead, like some cruel joke or a sign from above I, unexpectedly, got my period. Sorry if that's too much information for some. I tried to find some meaning to that... was it just a reminder of all things lost? Or the hope of what's possible? IDK. I guess it depends on how you interpret it. I shouldn't complain, really. Lily did whack me in the head this morning and "told" me to lift the covers up and move over so she could cuddle under the blankets with me. Her "sister" used to do the same thing. ;-)

I didn't know quite what to do with myself today. I couldn't stay put but, with everyone gone, I didn't necessarily have anywhere to go. I could have done whatever I wanted yet found myself not really wanting to do anything. I tried to finish a canvas I started awhile ago and couldn't stay focused enough to make sense out of it and just had to get out of here. I got in the car and drove around kind of wandering - not really knowing where I'd end up... I did reach a milestone of sorts while I was out.

Admittedly, I've been on a woe is me kick as of late... must be the time of year, I guess. Or maybe it's just that time of the month. ;-) I recently came across a folder which included some baby names I've been collecting over the years and some "must have shots" for my babies's 1st year slideshow or 1st week knowing me! I even had the song picked out for the video... "AS." Not Stevie's original- it has to be the one from The Fire Choir. I can't seem to find it online anywhere. It's off the cd CHURCH - Songs of Soul and Inspiration - one of the best albums ever. I always think about that "video" when I listen to that song. I'm still collecting favorite shots on my pin boards... and have a bunch of baby and mom slideshows saved on my computer for inspiration. . Since I may not get a chance to do my own video and in honor of all "mothers" today... I'll post one I came across shortly after I found out I was pregnant last year... Mom 2.0: Defining A Movement. I can't seem to stop myself from collecting all this stuff yet as each mother's day passes it gets further out of reach - even more so now. I don't know how I'm going to stop.

{Thanks to the ones that tried to bitch slap me out of my self induced funk today - even though it didn't really work. ;-) And thanks puppy dog... if you weren't waiting for me at home I probably would have kept on driving today - never to return. Love the Bud.}

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